Thread: the Official CHR joke page duel

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three hundred or so years ago in the middle of america there live a tribe of indians .. i believe it`s the present day state of Indiana .. anywho they survived mostly only an apatite of apples they grew ..one year they had a really bad harvest and 500 of them starved to death .. for almost 200 years they were simply known as the " indian apple less 500 " .. later a car race was named in their honor .. .. that ones got to get you .. HA !

That's pathetic

Originally Posted by NTFDAY

That's pathetic

is this better ? in the deepest darkest bush of the outback once in a large grass hut lived a king who ruled from a throne made of solid gold .. on more than one ocassion his throne was stolen as he slept so to prevent that in the future every night he hoisted his golden throne high into the ceiling of his hut stowed away and he slept under it .. one night the rope broke and the throne came crashing down and killed him .. moral of story .. people who live in grass houses should`nt stow thrones ..

WOW, that's about as bad

more you ask ? it is well know that Roy Rodgers had a shoe fetish .. he had thousands of pairs ..one day he came home from filming movies and found one of his favorite pair of shoes had been chewed upon .. he went ballistic .. his neighbor leaned over his fence and told him that he had seen a stray cat in the area earlier .. perhaps it got in thru the pet door and did its damage .. Roy set a trap and sure enuff caught the cat .. needless to say the cat was doomed .. as Roy was digging a hole in his back yard to burry the dead cat his neighbor leaned over the fence again and said " pardon me Roy ... is that the cat who chewed your two shoes " ...

Why do I feel like it's 1960 and I'm in Jr. High again.....

I don't get it.
But I have a feeling that I don't want it either.

Just like the Roy Rogers "Story"...

back by popular demand ... one more ... i recently went to my realtors office to inquire about a new property to purchase and while i was there i would from time to time hear a loud " GONG " sound ... like at the end of Bohemian Rhapsody " then a time or two i would hear a small " tink " like someone tapping a spoon on a drinking glass .. i asked what that was all about .. the realtor said that loud GONGS meant that a house had been sold but " little tinks mean a lot " .... no more i promise ... HA !!

AHHHH, as I told someone else recently, "Go to the kitchen and take your meds!" PLEASE...

Originally Posted by firebird77clone

I don't get it.
But I have a feeling that I don't want it either.

Ya gotta be an old fella to 'get' that.

To you young fellas under 70 it would mean nothing.

I got it...straight off.

sigh.

It's from the 40's, Chattanooga Choo Choo. Pardon me boy, is that the Chattanooga Choo Choo, Glen Miller band

After a long day on the golf course, I stopped in at Hooter's to see some friends and have some hot Wings and ice tea.

After being there for a while, one of my friends asked me which waitress I would like to be stuck in an elevator with.

I told them "The one who knows how to fix elevators".

I'm old, I'm tired, and I pee a lot.

Originally Posted by TOW'D

After a long day on the golf course, I stopped in at Hooter's to see some friends and have some hot Wings and ice tea.

After being there for a while, one of my friends asked me which waitress I would like to be stuck in an elevator with.

I told them "The one who knows how to fix elevators".

I'm old, I'm tired, and I pee a lot.

Ouch!
That hit a nerve...welcome to the OAP Club Hank!

While shopping for vacation clothes, she and her husband passed a display of bathing suits.
It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since she had even considered buying a bathing suit, so she sought her husband's advice.

"What do you think?" she asked. "Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?"
"Better get a bikini," he replied. "You'd never get it all in one."

He's still in intensive care.