Thread: the Official CHR joke page duel

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Makes me glad I don't work on cars anymore!

So I saw another picture, and found that the starter inside the bellhousing is a Bentley engine & tranny. The Northstar isn't in the bellhousing, it's UNDER the INTAKE!!! Looks like Caddy must have got the idea from Toyota...
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Starter 2.jpg

That one I've seen first hand. Not a terribly hard job and the intake seals usually fail before the starter or about the same time, (so I am told) but personally I think it's a whole lot better idea than in a bell housing! What's easier? Lift a plastic intake manifold? or remove a transmission?

Some of GM's LS series engines have the knock sensors under the intake. What a Duh. A while back I had one go bad so I replaced both and the wiring harness to make SURE I didn't have to do that again. After about two weeks one of the new sensors failed. GRRRRR.
Sometimes you just can't win.

Originally Posted by 34_40

That one I've seen first hand. Not a terribly hard job and the intake seals usually fail before the starter or about the same time, (so I am told) but personally I think it's a whole lot better idea than in a bell housing! What's easier? Lift a plastic intake manifold? or remove a transmission?

What's easier? Pulling a couple of bolts while laying in the parking lot of the auto parts store, carrying it inside to swap for a new/rebuilt and pulling out of the lot in less than ah hour!!

Originally Posted by rspears

What's easier? Pulling a couple of bolts while laying in the parking lot of the auto parts store, carrying it inside to swap for a new/rebuilt and pulling out of the lot in less than ah hour!!

No argument here!! Why do "engineers" feel the need to put an electromechanical device in a new location when the previous "standards" always worked to levels of mutual satisfaction on a world wide basis?!?!? Knowing full well the chosen location will shorten the effective service life of the unit. And make for ridiculous expenses totally un-needed and un-warranted. All I was saying in the above, it's a whole lot easier to lift the intake than pull the transmission.

Originally Posted by 34_40

No argument here!! Why do "engineers" feel the need to put an electromechanical device in a new location when the previous "standards" always worked to levels of mutual satisfaction on a world wide basis?!?!? Knowing full well the chosen location will shorten the effective service life of the unit. And make for ridiculous expenses totally un-needed and un-warranted. All I was saying in the above, it's a whole lot easier to lift the intake than pull the transmission.

Yeah, I agree especially considering today's plastic intakes!! It seems that the old adage, If it ain't broke don't FIX it! no longer applies, at least to the young guns calling the shots for the OEM's these days. I can't imagine the explanation for tucking the starter inside the bellhousing unless it was that anyone who buys a Bentley doesn't care about maintenance costs anyway....

Now, BACK TO THE JOKES!!!

I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather, not like the passengers who were in the car with him.

Too True!!
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EV.jpg

Uncle Bob posted this on FB and I'm sharing it here!
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FB_IMG_1666096193860.jpg

The Pope dies and at heaven he's met with a reception committee of angels who tell him he can enjoy any of the myriad recreations available.
He reads all of the original texts of the Holy Scriptures, and spent the next eon or so learning the languages.
After becoming a linguistic master he sits down in the library and begins to pore over every version of the Bible, working back from the most recent 'easy reading' to the original hand-written scripts.
The librarian angel hears a loud scream and finds the Pope huddled in a chair shaking and crying.
"The R! They left out the R!"
"What do you mean?" asks the librarian.
After collecting his wits, the Pope stops sobbing long enough to say: "The word was CELEBRATE!"

Thanks to the people who assured me that it's fine to allow your pets to sleep on your bed.

Now my goldfish is dead.

OH MY JB! Even Chris was laughing... between saying Oh, He was bad!

'Dear Paddy,

Your father has a new job, with 2,000 people under him. He's a gardener at the local cemetery.
Since I last wrote I have had all my teeth out and a new cooker put in.
I was going to send you a turkey but it got better.
I sent you a coat in the post. When the post office weighed it they said I'd have to pay extra for the buttons because they were so heavy. So I cut the buttons off. You'll find them in the top pocket.
We've had a threatening letter from the undertaker. Unless we pay the outstanding money for your grandma's funeral by Wednesday - up she comes.
I must close now. I would have enclosed some money, but I'd already sealed the envelope.
A team of council workers were drilling nearby and accidentally cut through the drains to the house. Since then there's been a terrible smell from your loving mother, Nancy.'

When you are
Feeling powerless
Just Remember, a
Single one of your
Turds can Shut
Down an entire Water Park

Originally Posted by TOW'D

When you are
Feeling powerless
Just Remember, a
Single one of your
Turds can Shut
Down an entire Water Park

Ever visit Disney? You know all the water rides they have? Guess where they get all that water from??? Yep, their wastewater plant. They consume so much chlorine the water turns it all yellow.