Thread: the Official CHR joke page duel

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Little Suzy had a box of very small kittens that she was trying to give away, so she had them out on the street corner with a sign 'FREE KITTENS' next to them. Suddenly a long line of big black cars came up with a policeman on a motorcycle in front. The cars all stopped and a tall man stepped out from the biggest car. 'Hi, little girl, what do you have there in the box?' he asked.

'Kittens' Little Suzy says. 'They're so small, their eyes are not even open yet.'

'What kind of kittens are they?' he asked.

'Democrats' says Little Suzy. The tall man smiled, returned to his car and they drove away.

Sensing a good photo opportunity, Sen. Obama called his campaign manager and told him about the little girl with the kittens. It was planned that they would return the next day, have all the media there and tell everyone about these 'democrat' kittens.

The next day, Little Suzy is standing out on the corner with her box of kittens with the 'FREE KITTENS' sign and the big motorcade of black cars pulled up with all the vans and trucks from ABC, NBC, CBS and CNN. Everyone had their cameras ready and then Sen. Obama got out of his limo and walked up to Little Suzy. 'Now don't be frightened,' he said, I just want you to tell all these nice news people just what kind of kittens you're giving away today.'

'Yes sir,' Suzy said, 'they are all REPUBLICAN kittens.'

Taken by surprise, Sen. Obama said, 'But yesterday you told me they were DEMOCRATS.'

Little Suzy says, 'Yes, I know. But, today they have their eyes open.

A man doing market research knocked on a door and was greeted by a young woman with three small children running around at her feet.

He says, "I'm doing some research for Vaseline. Have you ever used the product?" She says, "Yes. My husband and I use it all the time." "And if you don't mind me asking, what do you use it for?" "We use it for sex." The researcher was a little taken back.

"Usually people lie to me and say that they use it on a child's bicycle chain or to help with a gate hinge. But, in fact, I know that most people do use it for sex. I admire you for your honesty. Since you've been frank so far, can you tell me exactly how you use it for sex?"

The woman says, "I don't mind telling you at all. My husband and I put it on the door knob and it keeps the kids out."

> New Plan for saving the airlines:
>
> Dump the male flight attendants. No one
> wanted them in the first place.
>
> Replace all the female flight attendants
> with good-looking strippers! What the hell -- They don't even serve
> food anymore, so what's the loss?
>
> The strippers would at least triple the
> alcohol sales and get a 'party atmosphere' going in the cabin. And, of
> course, every businessman in this country would start flying again,
> hoping to see naked women.
>
> Because of the tips, female flight
> attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I
> suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for
> working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including
> lap dances and 'special services.'
>
> Muslims would be afraid to get on the
> planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a
> screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues.
>
> This is definitely a win-win situation if
> we handle it right -- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an
> asset.
>
> Why didn't Bush think of this? Why do I
> still have to do everything myself?
>
>
>
>
>
> Sincerely,
>
>
>
> Bill Clinton

If you're a "Baby Boomer", I'm sure that you can appreciate this. If younger - that's a sign of the times(to come ). Older - you already know.

You need your speakers turned on !!


http://www.newsday.com/news/opinion/...,1036393.blurb