Thread: the Official CHR joke page duel

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A Michigan State trooper pulled a car over on US 23 about 2
miles north of the Michigan/Indiana State line.
When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver
said he was a Magician and Juggler and was on his way to Ft.
Wayne , IN to do a show at the Shrine Circus.
He didn't want to be late.

The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling
and said if the driver would do a little juggling for him
then he wouldn't give him a ticket.

He told the trooper he had sent his equipment ahead and didn't have anything
to juggle.
The trooper said he had some flares in the trunk and asked if he could juggle them.

The juggler said he could, so the trooper got 5 flares, lit them and handed them
to him.

While the man was juggling, a car pulled in behind the patrol car.

A drunken good old boy from Michigan got out, watched the performance, then went over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and got in.

The trooper observed him and went over to the patrol car, opened the door asking the
drunk what he thought he was doing.

The drunk replied, 'You might as well take my ass to jail, cause there ain't no way I can pass that test

Mujibar was trying to get a job in India ..

The Personnel Manager said, 'Mujibar,

you have passed all the tests, except one.
Unless you pass it , you cannot qualify for this job.'

Mujibar said, 'I am ready.'

The manager said,
'Make a sentence using the words
Yellow, Pink, and Green .'

Mujibar thought for a short while and said,
'Mister manager, I am ready'

The manager said, 'Go ahead.'

Mujibar said,
'The telephone goes green, green ,
and I pink it up, and say,
Yellow, this is Mujibar.'

Mujibar now works at a call center.

No doubt you have spoken to him.
I know I have.

Two college kids from Boston were driving through Texas on the way to visit a friend from college. They were blasting down the Interstate at about 85MPH when a Texas State Trooper pulled them over. Seeing the out of state plates, the trooper decides to have a bit of fun.

When the trooper, who happened to be about 6', 6" and weigh 245, approached the car, the driver asks, "what seems to be the problem?" at which point the trooper grabs the kid, pulls his face real close and says, "boy, when you're driving in Texas and a trooper pulls you over, you had better have your license, registration and proof-of-insurance ready and waiting and don't you ever speak to a trooper unless you're asked to!"

Shaken, the young man fumbles through the glove box and produces the required documents for the trooper who then ambles back to his cruiser. After a few minutes, the trooper returns to the car, hands the driver his stack of paper with a speeding ticket on top. The trooper then walks slowly around the front of the car and comes to the passenger side and taps on the window with his nightstick. As the passenger rolls down the window, the trooper reaches in and cracks the passenger with a good back hand.

"What was that for?" gasped the passenger.

"I was just making your wish come true," replied the trooper.

"My wish?" exclaimed the young man!

"Yup - cause I just know that as your buddy pulls out of here, you'll say, 'I wish that trooped had tried something like that with me!' Have a nice day boys and remember, drive safe in Texas."

A letter to my bank.

Dear Sirs,

In view of what seems to be happening internationally with banks at the
moment, I was wondering if you could advise me. If one of my checks is
returned marked "Insufficient Funds," how do I know whether that refers to me or to you?

Sam died. His will provided $30,000 for an elaborate funeral. As the
last guests departed the affair, his wife Sarah turned to her oldest
and dearest friend. "Well, I'm sure Sam would be pleased," she said.

"I'm sure you're right," replied Jody, who lowered her voice and
leaned in close. "How much did this really cost?"

"All of it," said Sarah . "Thirty thousand."

"No!" Jody exclaimed. "I mean, it was very nice, but $30,000?"

Sarah answered, "The funeral was $6,500. I donated $500 to the
synagogue. The whiskey, wine and snacks were another $500. The rest
went for the Memorial Stone."

Jody computed quickly. "$22,500 for a Memorial Stone? My goodness, how
big is it ?"

"Two and a half carats."

:lol::lol::lol: