Englishman Doug Smith is on his deathbed, knows the end is near.

His nurse, his wife, his daughter and 2 sons, are with him.

"So", he says to them:

"Bernie, I want you to take the Mayfair houses."

"Sybil, take the apartments over in Pall Mall."

"Jamie, I want you to take the offices over in City Center."

"Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings on the Thames."

The nurse is just blown away by all this, and as Doug slips away, she says ,

"Mrs. Smith, your husband must have been such a hard-working man to
have accumulated all this property".

Sarah replies, "Property? ... the ars*hole had a paper round!"