Thread: If you think you got it bad.....

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This is way out of the hot rod track, so don't read on unless you've been down!
My brother ships out today for Iraq. He's a Doc in the Army. A couple of months ago his wife tells him she wants a divorce. He tells her that he will give her a divorce when he gets back from Iraq in May. This is one month after they buy there dream house! She was acting all strange, coming home late from work.....two words personal trainer! My brother finds out she's having an affair(3rd one since they've been married) So here he is shipping out and she plans to run the show while he's gone. So today she says because he had his life insurance changed to be put in a trust fund for their 8 year old daughter, that she's going to let the place fall apart and not pay the bills. This woman is cold hearted! She already gets half his pension and 400,000 if he dies, and it's not enough. I'm sorry but that's twisted. You cheat on your Husband, threaten to mess up his life, ignore and neglect your daughter so you have more time to fool around, and your pissed that your not getting it all!!!! I'm glad my wife and I get along! We trust eachother. Any miseries I may have are nothing to what he must be going thru.
To all those of you who serve out there, Thank you for what you must sacrafice for those of us who don't!

i hear you, and am sorry for his situation. my first wife 25 years ago cheated on me, the first night i found out i kicked her azz out and never let her back. fortunate for us we had no kids lives to ruin in the ordeal. and thats the worse part of all is she will probably use the child as a pawn to hurt your brother, and actually it will hurt the child worse in the end. ive been lucky the 2nd time around and just had our 20th wedding aniversary last month. ive got a wopping story i was going to post as to last months ordeals, maybe now i will do it and start a whiners and cryers thread, kinda a therapy thread for everyone to unload on. mine involves a kidnapping, a death threat, our daughters most wanted, a heart attack, an attempted robbery, and me drawing my hand gun on said person. ya it was a very merry xmas here.

I highly suggest that you or your brother consider both a divorce attorney (get the best one your family can afford right off the bat and DO IT NOW) and a private detective to administrate this ugly situation. Forget about the wife for a moment and think about the wellbeing of the child. Then get that private detective to build up the case for your brother and your family when he gets home.

Bill S.

And people think I'm weird for wanting to stay single! I've heard a lot of horror stories like that from guys I've worked with over the years. Oh, Stovens, tell your brother to be careful over there.

Yeah tell him be safe and get back here and cheat her out of money . Married 31 here some women are not for sticking to a marriage some change it like a plate of food . Not saying all guys are angels .

My ex-wife one time told me.
Why don't you work "over-time" so I can have a part-time job??
I was already working about 60 hours a week.
It was shortly after that a friend of mine gave me a call to give me the news about her messing around.
At first I did'nt believe him but then a second friend said the same thing so I hired a P.I.
It only took him 6 hours to get all the "dirt" on her.
I asked her why and all she could say she "I was bored".
The funny thing is her brother and her parents are some of the best people I know.
About every two weeks her dad will come by the shop.
My ex-father in-law has a great 37 Chevy we built togther about 15 or more years ago.
Yes,I know that is very strange.

Maybe he can invite her to Iraq for an accidental shooting.

Been there, done that. Pretty much same thing happened to me except you can insert "Doctor" instead of "Personal Trainer." I was so trusting I would wash her car before she "went out with the girls."

From experience I can tell you that your Brother's head is spinning right now, he has been blindsided by this and really has too much going on to make rational decisions. I basically walked away with my hot rod and two cats and gave her everything else.....house, car, furniture, bank accounts, etc. If I had been smart I could have gotten half, maybe more if I would have gotten a Private Eye and Attorney involved.........but I decided to be a Gentleman about it. Big mistake.

Mr Mustangs advice is very good. Get a Private Eye to get the goods on her, and start taking steps to protect himself. She is not going to play fair, regardless of what she tells you..........once friends and Attorneys get involved it becomes war. Being his Brother you should be able to sit him down and have a Dutch Uncle talk and help him through this. Contact all of his creditors and advise them what is going on, and HIRE A GOOD ATTORNEY. There are ways to protect yourself and minimize the damage, but the biggest hurdle for him right now is to overcome the emotional pain. Since he is being deployed there might be some protection for him in that........maybe the creditors can be put on hold somewhat.

I feel sorry for him, especially with other things going on in his life right now. Stories like this and what happened to me are another reason I am single and loving it.
Don

Oh, BTW, there IS a God in Heaven. My Ex now lives in a small apartment, all alone........Prince Charming turned out to be a Toad.

First thing that I notice that is in error in all the above situations, each one only had one wife at any one given time.

Originally Posted by TyphoonZR

First thing that I notice that is in error in all the above situations, each one only had one wife at any one given time.

Why do you have more than one???

I know a guy that married his high school sweet-heart got divorced in about 1990 and got then got back togther with her again in 1994 and then re-married again in 1997 and I think they got divorced again in 2003,last I heard they where dating again but I don't think they are married but I could be wrong.Yes,this is crazy.

Sad for your brother. I just want to add my agreement with what Pops says about the credit issues. I know your bro has a lot on his mind, but he really needs to shut down all the lines of credit NOW! If he thinks it's bad now, it'll be a whole lot worse when he gets back and has to try to dig out of a huge butt load of debt the (female dog explitive) will try to stick him with.

A guy I knew divorced and remarried the same girl 4 times. They said something about they better make it work out this time because the law (maybe in Oklahoma where they lived) only let you do that 4 times.

Talk about a Glutton for punishment!!

Don

Thanks for all the advice. I talked with him for over an hour about how he can't trust her. I told him he better get a legal separation or she'd ruin his credit while he was gone. I also advised him to get an estate manger in his abscence. He wouldn't listen to any of it. I think it just about killed him to admit he was headed for a divorce. I guess she moved out for a while over a year ago and they had been seeing a marraige counselor. When she moved back in she said her previous affairs were because she was bored...sounds familiar. He made a radical change in his life, stopped working late, came home before she did and worked on dinner, the house whatever, to be there for her and his daughter.
This time after moving into the new house for 1 day, she wanted to commit suicide. He refered her to their counselor. The counselor said she would do nothing unless his wife came to her. She had stopped taking ....yes...the 2000 buzzz word... "antidepressants" about the time she left him the first time. I was blown away to hear all of this as my brother has never mentioned any problems, ever until last month!
The story reads like a bad book. Her first affair was with her plastic surgeon and boss who, by the way she still works for! Her second was with a guy she picked up in a bar. It seems she has some need for people to notice her, so she and her best friend cruise bars and flirt with guys.
After hearing all of this I told him you've gotta get a lawyer and build a case against her. Evidently he has records of all her phone calls with all of these affairs, and seems to think that's enough!
I think he's so down in the dumps, that with shipping out to Iraq, he can't bring himself to do anything right now. When I talked with him at least he wasn't suicidal.
The funny thing is the day his wife wanted a divorce in WA, they had been married exactly 9 and a half years. In WA it takes six months to finalize a divorce, per my brother, and in the military your spouse is entitled to half your pension if you have been married for ten years! What a coniving beochhh!
By the way he is her second husband. I just hope that carma comes around to bite her in the ass!
Thanks for letting me vent here. It helps to let off steam with you guys!

Originally Posted by erik erikson

Why do you have more than one???

Haha, I love it Erik. Mutiple wives is the answer, no doubt. But in my god-forsaken land, we are not permitted to having more than one wife at a time, so I am reduced to having concubines/sweethearts on the side, if you will.

Does my first wife of 32 years like it, he!! no. It makes her jealous. But hey, I'll tell you one thing for sure, she is in the running. I mean at alll times. She makes sure she stays fit and trim and is willling to .... well you know, any time