Thread: My Solution for the TSA Groping Problem

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All of the attention that the TSA is getting regarding groping the passengers
got me thinking of ways to make the idea acceptable to the traveling public.

At every airport concourse, there appears to be a large group of TSA people,
some appear to be working but others tend to be in some idle mode. Let’s assume
that for every concourse of nominal size, there are 10 TSA employees at any
given time.

One runs the X-Ray machine
One stands at the magnetometer and waves their hand for you to come thru
One plays with the little grey totes that you put your shoes in

That leaves seven TSA people to grope you.

Hire three really hot young babes per shift to grope the male passengers. Each
passenger would have to have some identifying mark to keep them from going thru
the hand pat line more than once. The TSA uniforms for these ladies would be minimal.
Heck, charge for the pat down.

Hire three hunks to pat the women down. Same as the male passengers, one pat down
per flight.

Let’s see, this leaves one more TSA employee to hire….hire a really mean looking woman to pat down Janet Napolitano (our ex-governor)…..she would be allowed to go thru multiple
times…..the guv would love it

Ya' otta run for President, Robot!!

I say let em' ride the bus. }:-(

...but first I'll go let those babes pat me down a couple times. :-)~

I think I prefer the Slider Screening program.

Each passenger is offered a small pulled pork sandwich (a slider). Anyone who refuses to eat it gets the full, physical screening. The rest of us move along smartly to our plane, and have something more flavorful and nutricious than a dinky bag of old peanuts or stale pretzels. This has the added benefit of being much less expensive than the current program to boot.

Mark Levine said today that, if the President would take his hand out of Mr. Levine's pants, Mr. Levine would gladly let TSA put their hand in.