Thread: Tools and their uses....

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Any do-it-yourselfer can relate to some of these. . . .

~ SKIL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make boards too short.

~ BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.

~ WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, "Oh %#@&". Will easily wind a tee shirt off your back.

~ DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.

~ CHANNEL LOCKS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.

~ HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.

~ VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

~ OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for igniting various flammable objects in your shop and creating a fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.

~ TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing garage wall integrity. Very effective for digit removal!!

~ HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.

~ BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut large pieces into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge. Also excels at amputations.

~ TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of all the crap you forgot to disconnect.

~ PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.

~ STRAIGHT SLOT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms. Also used frequently as a punch and as a scraper.

~ PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.

~ PVC PIPE CUTTER: A tool used to make plastic pipe too short.

~ HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent to the object you are trying to hit. Also very effective at fingernail removal.

~ UTILITY KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door. Works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use. These can also be used to initiate a trip to the emergency room so a doctor can sew up the damage.

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I think we have the same shop...

Sounds about right. The table saw one is not off at all.

Thread chaser Don't do this I hear it hurts like hell. Remove the air hose from impact when digging the nut out of socket

Originally Posted by cffisher

Thread chaser Don't do this I hear it hurts like hell. Remove the air hose from impact when digging the nut out of socket

man .. i think i`d rather cut that off with a torch than unscrew it ...

Wow.

I think the impact has a reverse setting.

Just sayin

After many years in selling to the auto repair industry, I'm still amazed at the number of people who ain't aware of the difference between a Phillips head screw and a Pozi head screw. If one uses a Phillips screwdriver to undo a pozi head screw, they have a greater chance of stuffing not only the head of the screw but also the driver. A Phillips head screw driver will fit into both a Phillips and a Pozi head screw but the Pozi will only fit into a Pozi head screw. The lesson of the day is now complete.

Originally Posted by Whiplash23T

After many years in selling to the auto repair industry, I'm still amazed at the number of people who ain't aware of the difference between a Phillips head screw and a Pozi head screw. If one uses a Phillips screwdriver to undo a pozi head screw, they have a greater chance of stuffing not only the head of the screw but also the driver. A Phillips head screw driver will fit into both a Phillips and a Pozi head screw but the Pozi will only fit into a Pozi head screw. The lesson of the day is now complete.

I don't think we see many (any?) Pozi head screws here, and I've NEVER seen a Pozi driver. I think they're a Euro item, and apparently NZ/Aus too?

I agree not many around here except specialty hardware, when I was in the cabinet industry all of the hinges and cabinet hardware where Pozi but then again like you said almost all cabinet hardware is European (the best) or Chinese. Being in the cabinet/furnture field for 26 years yielded some intersting accidents with tools also, like a pneumatic clamp that flattened the end of a finger like a cartoon! However that nut on the finger takes the cake, I bet he hoped it was NC thread!

Originally Posted by rspears

I don't think we see many (any?) Pozi head screws here, and I've NEVER seen a Pozi driver. I think they're a Euro item, and apparently NZ/Aus too?

They're not common.
But they're not unusual either.

She Who Must Be Obeyed bought a flatpack of outdoor furniture the other day from Bunnings, we picked it up today, and I started assembling it.
All screws and bolts are posi head.

And my toolbox has the correct implements of mass destruction to assemble it.
That particular toolbox is of German manufacture; so they may be relatively common over there too.

(Why has your writing gone funny? Are you taking a leaf out of 34_40's book and punching a grizzly?)

Originally Posted by cffisher

thread chaser don't do this i hear it hurts like hell. Remove the air hose from impact when digging the nut out of socket

o-u-c-h-y!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's not what I would say, but meant for nicer company.

Originally Posted by johnboy

....(Why has your writing gone funny? Are you taking a leaf out of 34_40's book and punching a grizzly?)

Who? Me? Nope, when I typed the reply and it posted my normal, unadorned text all but disappeared against the Billboard message above, so I just went back and matched the font/size/bold/italic style so that it could be seen as equal.

Thanks for your consideration Roger and yes, I do prefer the larger darker font as I remember getting pulled up on how difficult it was to read when I used it at the standard size. Soooooo, that is now why I make it slightly larger and I must admit, I do find it easier to read myself especially as my eye sight has deteriorated.

Originally Posted by Whiplash23T

Thanks for your consideration Roger and yes, I do prefer the larger darker font as I remember getting pulled up on how difficult it was to read when I used it at the standard size. Soooooo, that is now why I make it slightly larger and I must admit, I do find it easier to read myself especially as my eye sight has deteriorated.

Whip, I've got to say that your logic doesn't make sense to me unless your concern is the easier reading of your own replies after they've posted, because your settings only affect what you write & post, not what others post in response. Now if your concern is reading the normal font in general, then the answer (seems to me) is to boost the display parameters in your browser settings. In Google Chrome it's a simple percentage ramp that remains in effect for all browsing, making everything larger and more defined. Your chosen font approach is not a problem to me, and it's definitely easy to know when a reply is from Whiplash23T, as you are the only active user who takes time to change font/size/bold/italic on just about everything you post. Again, it's not a problem and if it helps you with a vision problem then you should by all means use the tool. Besides it's a unique Whiplash23T feature!!